Dynamic People Skills

Dynamic People Skills

Developing Relationships That Develop Success

By: Dexter Yager

Characteristics of an immature person

1. Living in the immediate
2. Short on discipline
3. Dominated by emotions
4. Limited knowledge without knowledge of the limits
5. Operating from a sentimentality base, not a reality base
6. Sexually absorbed
7. Identity sensitive

Ten Obstacles to personal change

1. Get rid of the “Positive Cover”
2. Avoid the “Hidden Hooks” of Life
3. Let go of your “comfort blanket”
4. Give up deceptive desires
5. Quit being suspicious of change
6. Spring the trap of small thinking
7. Don’t ignore the passing of time
8. Avoid fantasy-filled failure
9. Destroy lethal laziness before it destroy you
10. Quit sabotaging yourself by focusing on yourself

Positive patterns for success: Personal nonnegotiables

1. Health
2. Family and friends
3. Morality
4. Spiritual life

Developing Principles for successful living

1. Make friends with the realities of life
2. Take responsibility for your action – and your reactions
3. Choose inspiring role models
4. Get excited by the posibilities
5. Get a direction and a mission
6. Practice forgiveness
7. Maintain sensible security
8. Balance time with people and time alone
9. Live in obedience to God

Productivity guidelines

1. Know and control your aggravation scale
2. Be willing to stretch
3. Ride the emotional flow of your life
4. Declare war on personal weakness
5. Keep your promises

Twenty one Dynamic People Skills

1. Practice a friendly flexibility
2. Broadcast positive body language
3. Keep your voice pleasant
4. Express convictions appropriately
5. Listen Attentively
6. Be prepared
7. Be autenthic
8. Find a connection
9. Build bridges
10. Be empathetic
11. Stand firm
12. Defuse conflict
13. Focus on a solution
14. Use a “Can you help me?” approach
15. Practice the “duck response”
16. Develop a sense of humor
17. Express genuine praise and appreciation
18. Exude Happiness
19. Make change easy
20. Becoma a storyteller
21. Pray with and for people

What motivates people

1. Desire for respect
2. A sense of legacy
3. Need for financial security

The Pursuit of Pleasure

1. Unreached golas of childhood
2. Desire for power
3. Desire for good health
4. Desire to please God
5. Helping others
6. The joy of life itself

Motivation murderers

1. Withdrawal from relationship
2. Loss of energy
3. Moral muck
4. Surrendering to doubt
5. Trying to be somebody else
6. Gorillas from the past
7. Laziness and pessimism
8. Guilt

Staying Motivated

1. Focus on your dream
2. Remember who you influence
3. Remember honor and duty
4. Keep good role models in front of you
5. Get your daily surge
6. Jus do it!

Deal with regret:

Sources of regret

1. Emotional baggage
2. Halfheartedness
3. Deliberately hurting someone
4. Missed opportunities
5. Not taking care of yourself
6. Financial missteps
7. Relationship blunders
8. Unfulfilled personal expetations

Why it’s hard to deal with regret?

1. Fear of personal guilt
2. Fear of ongoing damage
3. Fear of emotional exhaustion
4. Powerless depression
5. Spontanious anger

How to handle regret

1. Make a clean sweep
2. Commit to forward focus
3. Be your own best friend
4. Develop a desciplined memory
5. Practice thankfulness
6. Concentrate of giving
7. Acknowledge a spiritual base
8. Believe on yourself

Seven reasons people reject you

1. You’ve become a threat to their lack of performance
2. Jealousy
3. Reluctance to change
4. Misconceptions
5. Mistrust
6. Dislike 
7. Experiences of personal rejection and disappointment

How rejection affects you

1. It causes you to soubt your judgment
2. It challenges relationships you thought
3. It feed your natural insecurity
4. It cracks your confidence
5. It attacks your most basic motivation

How Not to respond to rejection

1. Rapid retreat
2. Sellout to self-doubt
3. Camouflage compromise
4. Approval pursuit
5. Becoming a turtle
6. Recycling the rejection
7. Rejection reflection

Right ways to respond to rejection

1. Spiritual  clarity
2. Battle training
3. A love of excellence
4. True grit

True grit give you three things:

1. Emotional control
2. Mental discipline
3. The power of chosen optimism

How’s your ego doing?

1. You feel secretly hurt or resentful when other people are recognized or rewarded
2. You tend to resist new information
3. You talk about yourself too much
4. You tend to de-edify other people
5. You resist constructive feedback
6. You treat the laws of God Lightly

How to retain humility

1. Never lose your sense of wonder at what you’re learning from others
2. Cultivate gratefullness
3. Make people your priority
4. Learn to see yourself from God’s perspective

Eliminate negative patterns

Negative Relationship patterns

1. Temperamentalism
2. Response laziness
3. Reaction ruts
4. Relational fantasies
5. Operating from assumptions, not facts
6. Pouring negatives onto others\
7. Manipulation games
8. Attack of the raptor

Changing negative patterns

1. Don’t be trapped by perfectionism
2. Don’t ignore your vulnerabilities
3. One other thing to avoid

The Humanistic View of People

1. Life is primarily a physical phenomenon
2. People are simply an advanced form og animal life
3. People are morally neutral
4. People are environmentally controlled and developed

Negative emotions

1. Fear
2. Worry
3. Anger
4. Depression
5. Hatred

Positive emotions

1. Desire
2. Confidence
3. Excitement
4. Happiness
5. Love

How emotions work?

1. Emotions are responders – not inisiators
2. Emotions follow an ebb-and-flow pattern
3. Emotion have only the power you give
4. Emotions can be mistaken

Mastering your emotions

1. Understand them
2. Accept them
3. Control them

Wrong reasons for dating

1. Sex
2. Status
3. Social preassure

Right reasons for dating

1. To honor God
2. To build up the orthe person
3. For personal development
4. To prepare  for marriage

Vital quality in the person you date

1. Respect
2. Good manners
3. Emotional stability
4. Sense of humor
5. Thins in common
6. Strong identity
7. Be the right kind of person yourself

Communication blockages

1. Controlling
2. Crushing
3. Ridiculing
4. Negative comparisons
5. Extracurricular satisfaction
6. Lack of responsibility and discipline
7. Inability to accept reality
8. Living by lies

How to restore intimacy

1. Respect your partner
2. Act and speak with honesty
3. Lead in love
4. Protect your source
5. Dream together an celebrate
6. Make sex a priority
7. Be united spiritually